♥ Inspiration: Read this meme and if it resonates with you, read on…

 

♥ Insight: Something for you to ponder…

We all want well-mannered, well-behaved children especially when we are in public or the in-laws are over for tea. Children need to be taught how to behave if they are to behave appropriately. There is no argument with that…however…being aware of how important it is that they also be allowed to feel their emotions will help us to do both when we need to respond to their less than desirable behaviour.

In order for children to take up a relationship with themselves they have to experience who they really are by how they are truly feeling. They need to practice not only the pleasant feelings but the big, loud, mad, sad and raging feelings too. All feelings are equally important and valid. Taking up a relationship with their full spectrum of emotion is what makes them feel whole.

When well-intentioned parents hurriedly jump on ‘inappropriate’ behaviour with the sole purpose of getting their child to replace the ‘unacceptable’ with ‘the desirable’ we circumvent the child’s opportunity to feel the raw emotion coursing through their bodies.

Not being given the invitation or time to feel their emotions, not being helped to name the feelings and not being lovingly supported as they move through their feelings is what robs the child of the opportunity to come to know what is going on for them from the inside out. This doesn’t bode well for them in the future given that society expects children to grow into adults who will be able to process their emotions rather than acting out on them. (Sadly, we all know adults who have missed the boat in that area).

Appropriate behaviour and impressive manners are a result of the ability to process emotion, the gift of gentle guidance and a big dollop of maturity. None of these can be hurried and they all need the loving support and understanding of a caring parent if they are to occur. Once we understand and value the importance of emotion we are well on our way to planting the seeds of ‘socially appropriate’ behaviour in our children and it’s our deep love for them that keeps us invested in their long term growth and development.

♥ Intention: If you feel moved to set an intention for today, this could be it…

Today I will try and keep my focus on how my child is feeling rather than fixating on hurrying them through their emotions. I will remind myself that no matter how big or messy their expression,  by allowing them the space to experience their feelings I’m supporting their long term growth and development.  I will do my best to make room for their emotions and will attempt to gently guide them through their feelings. ♥

 

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